Blessing my lucky stars

I watched a doco tonight on a program I had recorded weeks ago.  I wont get into details here, but I was amazed at statistics, pictures, and outcomes.  The doco touched me deeply, as it was something to which I have personal experience with.  Each day can be a struggle... not always, but certain smells or images can set me into a trance and could very easily put me back to all those years before.

All those years of fun, freedom, carefree living. Oh, and the paranoia, the learning of who your 'friends' really are, the realization of the capabilites within you.. good & bad.

I am so pleased that I can sit here today, type away to strangers & people who have become my world (and who probably know more about me than most of my family) and those who like to listen to my secrets & stories of my world.  Im feeling extremely lucky that I have survived all of the past, relatively unscathed in comparision to what could have been. And, feeling so gracious that I am who I am because of that journey.... yet, so cautious because of what I did to get there... or here.

Today I feel lucky because of where I have been, what I have done, who I have met, and why I did those things.... all to be here today, in this moment, with this experience of life.