I went out to eat Indian the other night with a friend. Partly, it was a nice way to toast goodbye to one of the internet boys… he was Indian. Nothing against Indians, but it was my sick twisted humor in going to eat Indian and secretly toasting goodbye to him… in style.
Upon coming home, I could feel my stomach start to explode. It was so full of air, it felt like I had grown a soccer ball within 10 minutes. Gas. Lovely. And goodness.. .they were not good smelling ones either! I would fart and have to walk away from the nastiness.
I make it to bed, laying in the fetal position holding my gassy tummy. Oh it hurt so bad. And it felt like no matter how much I would fart, it wouldnt be any better any time soon.
I toss & turn. Convinced Im ready to die. I finally lay on my back and get as comfy as I think I possibly can get in this pain.
And I let a ripper of a fart go. I knew it would be best to grab the blanket and wave it up and down to let the smell go from the sheets (as if you havent done that before, come on..) but I decide it probably smells too nasty to do that. So I just laid there…knowing what lurked under the sheets.
All of a sudden, Little Miss (who sometimes get called Tigger cuz she bounces all over the place when shes busy) jumps on the bed in such a spot that the damn doona waves and lets the nasty smell out… right to me…..
Lesson? Just air out the sheets..you just never know who is going to come bouncing on your bed, and then its just 3 times as bad…. seriously.
Little Miss… gotta love her!
5 comments:
Don't ya just love the little critter that brings you to reality! Good reminder that EVeryones shit stinks! Cat probably went and cleaned herself for an hour trying to make sure it wasn't her!
God -what did you order??
NICE! HAHA. When I was little and my parents were out late my brother would lay with me until I fell asleep and we'd fart like crazy doing the "pull my finger" stuff and trapping them under covers and then waving them to the surface. Makes me puke now to think about it. LOL!
Hahaha so funny! I eat Indian alll the time and have never... Come to think of it I only eat vegan Indian... So it's probably got something to do with the bad meat scratch probably and make that positively.
Hooray for little tigger kids! Hehe
farts are timelessly funny, even when smelly.
the ribs are made of a wheat gluten mixture, steamed for about an hour, slathered in bbq sauce, then grilled, and slathered some more. you should totally get tami's book
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